Tuesday, August 4, 2009

L.

You saw your mother murdered when you were young,
and went to live with an aunt who despised you,
so you left that loveless home; fell in love, had a family,
until your husband started beating you every night;
you had to leave.
You lost your children to the bureaucracy, now you were all alone.

And that is how I found you, alone on a crowded street hawking newspapers.
You miss your children terribly, but they will have nothing to do with you,
You yearn to be with someone you could love and who could love you.

Nights find you in a park or hallway exhausted.
Unable to sleep you cry, alone, with no one to wipe your tears or comfort you.

The dawn reminds you of how deeply alone you are.

In your own words, "It's just I know I do not fit in, and knew it when I was a little girl. I just feel it now more because I'm bigger and nothing has changed as far as me not fitting in. I guess I have to keep trying."

She tells me she's sorry when she's not in a good mood, I tell her she's beautiful and love her very much.

So we sit on the sidewalk in front of the restaurant, and I hold her close to me while we talk for hours.